What defines an Aussie man - Bruce Pascoe

I like men who can be rueful, self deprecatory, ironic, good at stories. Can lean on a bar with a thoughtful beer smiling at them and not think they have to force conversation. A bloke should be handy with a hammer, able to guide a boat through a sloppy sea and still have time for a fish and a yarn but he shouldn't wear a Dennis Lillee moustache and strike that tedious pose of gruff ill humour that so many men see as masculine presence. He should be as good at cleaning up as he is at incinerating steak. He should never talk about cars or power tools. A bloke's eyes should sparkle when he sees a kid do something crazy, they should keep sparkling when an attractive woman approaches with that 'what are you lookin' at' look. He should be able to talk to that woman, credit her with intelligence, make her laugh. He should back up the highway to check that the roo or wombat slain by the side of the road has no baby in the pouch and if it has he should accept it in good grace when that attractive woman snatches the pink suckling baby and holds it to her as if no man would know what to do. He should study the light in her eyes and love it like his own heart. It'd be nice if in the morning he stroked the hair away from her brow without waking her, just so he can see the passage of dawn across her cheek. I reckon he should spend time teaching a child to do up his shoes so he doesn't make a dill of himself at school. He should accept it in good spirit when he is chastised for teaching the bunny ears method because the kids thought it was stupid. When the same child gets as pissed as a newt at his first dance it would be nice if the man walked the lad up and down and chose his moment to say, "Never mind, mate, but don't make it a career choice, the pay is lousy." It'd be nicer still if a man could be like that all the time, but in my experience there are times when he's as mean as Phillip Ruddock.

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