Pam Ann: Around the World

Are you a confident flyer yourself? As I travel more and more, the more I get nervous. I have the most extensive library of airplane information which I have passionately researched, so trust me, I know the risks of air travel. The part of flying I get a little nervous about is the take off; it's called ‘the point of no return' as soon as that plane thunders down the runway, wings full of fuel, there is a point the plane has to take off and if there is a mechanical malfunction at this junction you can forget the slides, forget the brace position... hello human ash cloud! Once I am up at 37,000ft I am fine and landing doesn't bother me, unless the plane is trying to land in bad weather and with no wheels!

Do you hanker for a simpler time when there were "air hostesses" rather than "in-flight customer service representatives"? Oh, you can't beat the glamour days a time when boarding a Boeing meant style class and glamour. A time you were greeted with a Rothmans on arrival and the when the air hostess said "welcome aboard" and she genuinely meant it! Today the cabin crew don't make eye contact and when they do they speak with their eyes, ‘fuck off'.

Are Caroline and Pam similar, or is there a clearly delinated line between them? I am shyer than Pam and I would never say the things Pam says to people. She says what people are thinking and I am more polite and not so forthright and demanding. She is filthy and fucks around the globe whereas I like to be in a relationship. She's delusional - well, I guess I can be as well, after all I did create her. Even this feels strange talking about Pam Ann as though she is real: it's a fine line!

Your reputation for putting celebrities in their place is formidable: any of them ever take umbrage, or are they all pretty game (or just masochistic)? With celebrities, the more A-list the more they love to be put in their place. They are so used to getting their ass licked I think it turns them on to be told what to do and to shut up and pick their own bags up! Pam Ann was a hit when she was hired to crew on Elton John's private jet; she verbally abused celebrities all the way to Venice and back! They loved her so much Elton kept the plane in Venice so Pam could fly them all home and do it all again!

What can Sydney audiences expect on your return home? Virgin Blue will be getting a good roasting, as will many Australian airlines. The audience should expect to feel like they are in a hijack situation because I will be locking the doors to automatic. It's all about audience participation and improvisation – I feel most at home when I am riffing off an audience. I think that's why people come to the shows because every night is different and people enjoy seeing Pam Ann get out of sticky situations she has created. I am really excited to see all my Aussie fans. We are going to have one big big party.