Screw the Olympics, let’s go to the movies

The Curse of the Gothic Symphony

Classical music! A drunken composer! A cursed score! It’s as far from displays of hyper-fit sports champs as you can get

The Dark Knight Rises

Everyone’s gonna be watching the bloody Games, so here’s your chance to see this blockbuster on a big screen and avoid the crowds. Besides, a football field gets destroyed in it – take that, sporting achievement!

In Darkness

It’s been a while since we’ve had a rip-roaring WWII drama and In Darkness is a cracker. This story of Polish Jews hiding fom the Nazis in the sewers of Lvov is powerful, moving stuff. 

A Royal Affair

It’s the breakout foreign language hit of the year and a costume drama to boot, set in 18th century Denmark. Its hero, played by Mads Mikkelsen, is a doctor who champions human rights – that’s what we call medal-worthy.

Magic Mike

Athletes: they train to the peak of physical condition, but when do they ever get naked for the camera? Almost never, that’s when. Even the bloody swimmers wear full body suits these days! On the other hand, Channing Tatum and friends let it all hang out in this well reviewed tale of male strippers. (PS: There’s plenty of hot female nudity in it as well.)

Marley

“I was gonna train for the 100 metres freestyle/But then I got high…” OK, so that’s not actually a Bob Marley song, but you know what we mean.